On Sunday 13 October at Hatch: A better tomorrow I made two promises:
1) To be true to myself all the days of my life.
2) To find the most significant love of my life in the next 10 years.
I take neither of these promises lightly – one made before a public audience and the other made to artist Krissi Musiol – both will take a concerted effort on my part, but as I ponder the weight of both of these promises my main hope is that in keeping one, I don’t lose the ability to keep the other.
It’s been a long time since I’ve been properly in love (you know, with someone who felt the same way) but I remember how easy it is to lose yourself in the first blushes of romance, to shape yourself in to forms to please the object of your affection, to edit out the parts of yourself that they don’t like or don’t quite seem to fit. It’s just marketing, everybody does it. Of course some compromise is necessary in order to accommodate another person in your life, in your personal space. I wonder if after you shave of the sharp edges, soften the quirks and nuances that make you you, can you ever get them back?
If I change in order to achieve something I want, to be with someone else, am I still being true to myself?
But I’m getting ahead of myself. In order to keep the second promise I do have to change. I have to change how I am living. I have to make more of an effort to create opportunities for connections and romance to happen.
There is a very cute guy at work…